The Weekend that Built the Wall & the Tuesday that Tore it Down

The Weekend that Build the Wall

It was the weekend that built the wall.

When those around me described their tumble and their fall.

It crept up on me, not making a sound.

Placing itself where it knew I'd be found.

Brick by brick they built and built,

a wall of issues like a patchwork quilt.

From afar, the artful work would make you catch your breath,

But from right up close, it reeked of death.

But it was I who aided the work

Carrying their water, like such a jerk.

In my paralyzed state of foolish bliss

It was my closeness to the Father that sunk into the abyss.

The Tuesday that Tore it Down

As fresh as one can be

walking in from a night that passed abysmally.

Expectation at an all time low

Reality stunting all that wants to grow.

And yet!

O Come, O Come! Emmanuel.

Come, and dig out a place in my heart to dwell.

From all that filth and stubborn guilt,

Create something that is only yours to be built.

Every life must be proceeded by death,

So let the funeral become my gasping life-breath.

And though I complain and complain,

I must know this is your domain.

And this is what I need to be told,

Onto this I must most tightly hold.

That you are God, and I am most certainly not.

And at the end of the day, I can live with that as my lot.

The Long Look

The clouds meander across the day,

Hanging, lingering,

Between the earthly black and the

Pure ether blue.

The leaves perform their dainty, death dance

Before wafting toward the depths - the earthly black.

All we see is the naked, anemic arms.

It loiters in the tepid air,

The long look, the immoderate stare.

Longing to be called home,

Longing to be given back.

Aiming for the ether blue,

It lashes into the earthly black.

Hope.

When to see a change is all

That is desired.

But when to see a change is all

That will take the most,

Break the most,

Hurt the most.

When to see a change is all

That will inspire.

But that change cannot be taught

By you alone.

Cannot be bought

By you alone.

Cannot be fought 

By you alone.

When to see a change is 

To see yourself.

When to see yourself is 

To break the mirror,

To shatter the soul.

When the cost of your soul is all

It takes to see a change.

But when the view is all

Devastation and confusion.

Wreckage strewn all

Across the shore.

Who can replace these tears?

Can any explain?

But I hope.

I do not wish.

I have a hope - not fanciful longings.

A real hope - not unfulfilled desires.

A true hope - not postmodern rhetoric.

A living hope  - not dead philosophies.

Hope.

I have hope.

Emotion.

What is this heart of mine?

The promised flesh,

Or the cold, hard, stone?

Do we have a problem 

When other people are fine

And it's myself I distrust?

When my mind can entertain all sides

Yet still maintain the record of deadly wrongs.

What am I killing - 

Is it really me,

Or just who I could have been?

Surely you are bigger than emotion,

Because at the moment

Emotion is bigger than me.

Untitled.

Destiny.

A sense of something bigger

It comes at time when you can smell the cold in the air

Taste the chill of the dawn

A mission

A role

Like the sun casting light over the land at sunrise

A sense of the big picture

You feel like a giant

Fulfilled

Knowing the reason

Daylight breaks over your soul

And suddenly you have strength enough to face the year

 

Excitement

Despite disappointment

Turmoil calms

Is the world in your palms?

You can do greater things than these,

Just tell me how, please?

The truth will set you free

But it will never let you be.